So much for promises; promises. We were promised that Dark of the Moon would be much, much better than Revenge of the Fallen. Either Mr. Bay is a liar, or he really doesn't know a bad movie when he sees - or makes - one. The fact that Dark of the Moon was a bit better than Transformers 2 is hardly worth mentioning, since it wasn't possible to cinematically worse than that infamous movie and modern poster-child for all-style-and-no-substance movie-making.
Let us shortly (and mercifully) recap a few of the irksome plot devices - and I use those last two words lightly - of Dark of the Moon: we were promised that, given the extra time they would have to write the story, it would be a lot more focused than its predecessor. Although this is hardly quantifiable, let's just say it certainly seemed disjointed enough. The Transformers might not have been flying around Egypt, but they were still going back and forth between Earth (Chicago) and space. It would have been more efficient and definitely more energy-conscious to just hide the space-time thingies under the earth or in some part of the ocean humans can't reach - there are plenty. How about transforming those sources of energy into a nuclear power plant or something, hiding them right under our noses? Michael Bay's Transformers always seem to do things the hard way - remember Revenge of the Fallen desert battle scene, where Sam and the dearly-departed Mikaela were running from Decepticons, with A few Autobots running right alongside them? It still escapes me why they wouldn't just turn into a souped-up car and simply drive them to their destination; it's much faster.
One of the most surprising conclusions to a movie-fight ever had to have been Sam Witwicky dispatching Starscream. Without any weapons but Batman's simplest device: a grappling hook. Yes; you read that right. The mighty Raptor fell to a grappling hook, wielded by a human. You can't make this stuff up...unless you're the writer of Dark of the Moon.
Optimus Prime's oldest warrior-chieftain and closest friend, Ironhide, was killed by the traitor Sentinel Prime in Transformers 3. While there's nothing really wrong with this per se, up to that point in the movie, he hadn't been made to matter to us, and his death was treated as "all-in-a-days-work" by Autobot and Decepticon alike. If the Transformers don't care about their brethren, why should we? Sentinel Prime's cold-hearted dispensation was akin to a robotic psychotic break; something seriously went wrong with his circuits to have so callously killed an old comrade. At least Dark of the Moon satisfied our collective need for vengeance; Optimus would dispatch with Sentinel in an even more unceremonious coup de grace much later - even as Sentinel pleaded for his life.
The final curious thing about the Dark of the Moon was a near-execution involving the captive Bumblebee and a Decepticon minion. This one you've got to see to...err...believe; except, it's doubtful you understand why a heavily armed robot would kneel, cannons uselessly to his side, while another robot prepares to blow the circuits out his head - right after having just done the same to another friendly. It's just odd. But then, there was hardly reason to expect anything else, from this movie that ran roughshod over the loud promises for a better showing next time. Ah well.
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